Warning: prepare for melo dramatic Seyi in this post
I can attest first hand to experiencing the winter blues. When I was living back in DC, it was my first time really being on my own in a completely new area. I thought I was handling it well, until fall/winter rolled around. I was a bit confused as to why I was soooo emotional during that season. This is coming from a highly emotional person, btww. But what I was experiencing was very different than the norm. I was just sad. I felt like things weren’t working out. Grad school was difficult, I missed my family and friends, blogging wasn’t doing anything for me. I felt extremely lonely, and overall I just felt like my life sucked. It felt like everybody was moving towards something and I was just stuck in this same position. And I HATE feeling like I am stuck.
This year, I’ve been dealing with the winter blues once again. Granted, my life has been going through a bit of a change the past few weeks that has left me in the most uncomfortable position I’ve ever been in. But even with that, I’ve noticed that my attitude and overall personality is just…bleh. Also my skin is acting a whole fool so that really isn’t helping either. And not to be overly dramatic, but also, who am I without the dramatics. Everything has been annoying me as of late. I MEAN EVERYTHING. It could be the smallest thing and I find myself having to woosah just to avoid me going off. I also feel like such a late bloomer with things. I can’t really explain it but basically I just feel like it takes me 50 million years to get to a certain point, when it “seems” like it takes the next person about 2 whole seconds. Again, I’m probably being dramatic but just bear with me as we go through this post.
Yes, I am fully aware that there are people in the world who are literally going through so much worse than me. And often times, that does give me perspective and forces me to “suck it up”. But I would be lying if I said that I don’t get in my feelings more often than not. Maybe it’s the INFJ in me. Emphasis on the F. But upon talking to others, I realized that I wasn’t alone. Which led me to write this post. So if you’ve been feeling in a super funk lately, continue reading for a few practical ways you can ease the feeling of sorrow
Talk it out. Whether it’s talking to yourself, talking to someone else, or talking to God, speaking can help you acknowledge what you’re feeling more clearly. I talk to myself all the time, whether it’s in my head or out loud (in a private space). I’ve had moments where I have literally just yelled out because I did not know what else to say. I’ve also gone to God with all my frustrations. And I mean…ALL 50,000 OF THEM! I’ve stopped sugar coating how I feel: with myself, with God, and to people I talk to. If you ask me how my day is going, and my day is straight trash, I am telling you that my day is STRAIGHT TRASH. The same with God, I no longer hold back. What’s the point?? God knows what I am already dealing with so me voicing it out comes as no surprise. And honestly, ever since I’ve taken this “no holds back” approach, I have felt slightly lighter.
Get out. No, not the movie. Unless you’re in situation like that. In that case, RUN! In all seriousness though, take numerous walks outside. Sit alone somewhere and people watch. Drive around aimlessly with the windows rolled down. When things like that are unplanned, they help to release that pent up emotion you’re feeling. Just the other day I was feeling very tensed (more tense than usual) and I literally grabbed my keys and drove towards the beach. I just happened to take some streets that I am very familiar with, and had no intention of ending up there. But the cool beach breeze was nice and the empty roads was a far cry from the usual bumper to bumper madness we call LA.
Take Deep Breaths. I find myself getting tensed up very easily. Something as simple as taking 5 minutes to do deep breathing has become helpful in releasing that tension. It also allows me to calm my mind and take a moment to just focus on my own well being instead of everything that is going on around me.
Laugh. I know, simple right. But in the midst of me going through things this last quarter of the year, my joy was lacking. I’ve always been satisfied with how happy I used to be. It was my thing. And now, things are just different. That happiness isn’t all the way there and I didn’t realize how much of an effect it was having on my overall personality. But doing things like watching funny shows, laughing at funny memes (shoutout to my sis who literally knows all the memes), and such is helpful. We all have a small kid in us that just wants to come out and play every now and then, so why not let her/him.
and finally remember, Nothing Lasts Forever. This is something I’ve had to repeatedly tell myself over the past few weeks. Everything has a beginning and an end. While things may feel like they are lasting much longer than they need to (it’s always the struggle that seems to last the longest), I promise you, it won’t. I’ve come out of some serious emotional turmoil in the past and this is just another hurdle to get over.
Until next time…
All Photography by Kristen Ashley